27.03.2010

Puncak Permai Bau Camp here I come.Tomorrow Michelle Wong, Victoria Tho and I are going to that camp.All of us are going to stay at least 2 and a half month.Where as Yian Ping,Lily Lim and Liew Ying are going to Sematan camp.However,before we went to our respective camp,we have to meet at Stadium Perpaduan.This is the last time we meet before I go national service.Friends I might not be able to finish 2 and a half months camp due to my personal reason.Hehex.Friends,I hope got people come and visit me.Hope so.ERM...I felt so sad not because I don't want go national service is just that I'm going to miss my favourite food and my friends.I have to say bye bye to my lovely laksa,''ang ji peng'',pizza,kfc,mum's cook,chicken rice and etc.Oh ya...This is my last post before I go camp.I have to say bye bye to facebook,MSN,blog and favourites drama.Though it is temporary,I will try not to think bout it.I also can't go church at 7th miles there.I'm going to Bau Methodist church.Hehex

Medical Check Up

This morning,I went to Tanah Putih Clinic for medical check up.It was very complicated.First I have to go register.And before registered,I have to take number then have to queue for register.Registration take me half an hour like that. After that,I have to wait for one hour plus to check up. I go to room 6 and have a checked on my weight,height,blood pressure,pulse rate,eyesight, temperature and colour blindess absence or presence.I'm sad that I become shorter and happy that I lose weight.Later, I went to room 12.I had to collect my urine.Yucky,so disgusting.Then,I had a blood test.Its so painful!!!The next step is go room 4 and have a check on heartbeat.My medical check up ended.I thought I can have a check on my teeth but in the end no checking.The form there got 1 part is on nasal,oral and throat.However,no one ask me to go check this part.I felt so sad.I want to check my teeth and I thought I can ask for an appointment on washing my teeth there.So sad that no one ask me to do that.It was so sad that Imeet some new friends without knowing their name.Hahax.

Blackout

Last night around 10:30p.m. ,the whole Lorong Keranji 4F2 no electric.At that time I was watching televisyen program.I can't do anythings.I can't online.Therefore,I went bed sleep so early.Electric came at around 11:20p.m..I not yet sleep at that time.However,I'm so lazy to came down to online.

Swt

I've receive 1 letter from Public Universities.The university is named University Putra Malaysia. However,I'm not going to take into those course.This is not high nose (hidung tinggi).Haha.I didn't want to go that university is because the course to let me choose all is on socialize to people and some are not relate to the subject I had took during Form 4 and 5.Therefore, I give up that university.Swt!!!!!Will I still received any public university that had my own lovely subject n courses?Hope so !!!But the probability is so low!!!Swt!!!But I still hope I can receive more offer from public university.

HAPPY

My permission to change camp is approved.If my permission turn down,I have to go Ayer Keroh Rekreasi Malacca camp.Luckily is approved.Now,I'm in Puncak Permai Bau camp.Mum and dad can come to visit me.Happy to hear that news.If my friends can come here and visit me is perfectly good.Haha.Thanks Lord for hearing my words when I pray!!!Thanks Lord.Hehe.

22.03.2010

6 more days to go!!!Sunday morning I have to go to national service.However, until now I don't know which camp should I go.It is so funny.After Sunday I have to wait for several weeks to log in facebook ,MSN ,Hotmail ,Blog, Viwawa and my lovely dramas. Sobz!!!

18.03.2010

要和不要就在于一念之间。我们通常都处在迷惑当中，不知该选哪一条路。我说得对不对呢？每个人都拥有自己的想法。我常常处在左右不分的状况。我时时刻刻都会犹豫不决，根本不能决定任何事情。听了一些友人的提醒，我开始处在迷雾当中。我失去自我了！！我不能坚定我自己的意志了。可悲啊！！！我还是只能祷告。愿神赐给我力量、光、智慧以及清醒的头脑，并且给我指导，带领我走向正确的道路 。谢谢神垂听我的祷告，我的祷告乃是奉主耶稣之名求。阿们。

Lost

After receiving my SPM results,i'm quite disappointed.I did not achieve the target that I and my parents had set before.I make them down.However, I'm not purposely make them down.I does not fulfill the requirements of the scholarship.As a results,I cannot go for Universities that I want.=(In my mind there is no private Universities as dad told me earlier on.Matriculation is just for those who have good results and poor family to study.So,I had to say bye bye to matriculation. Scholarships also need to hear my bye bye voice.Haha.I only have the way to go Form 6.However, I have no confidence at all to study Form 6.But,dad keep on nag at me say that I should go Form 6.He say this is the only ways to continue my study.In my heart,I felt so sad when I hear that.I keep on asking myself "is that the only road I had to take?"I just don't want to admit the truth. But I had heard lots of people say Form 6 is tough and not easy to study.For me, I have the same opinion as them.I tell my feeling to my dad.However,he keeps on say that I haven study how I know its hard.And he even say that if its hard then I should be more hardworking to do exercise and do more revision.Say is easier than do,am I right?"If I study hard,then I can do well in examination."is this true?Then does this means when I study in Form 5,I'm not hardworking enough?I think I have do my best in it.But just that I still cant achieve the target YOU set for me.I'm totally lost in this moment.Mum is always stand at my side.Mum will always ask and try to understand me.But why cant you?Does there no other ways for me beside studying Form 6.Do I really don't have chances studying at other courses?Now, the only things that I can do is just pray.To the Lord,I just hope that Lord will open my road and help me to decide the road that I should choose.Amen.

Being Cheat!!!

You cheat me!!!You say you won't mind whatever I get you will just admit it.However, you didn't do so.And now you make my feeling downs again.I hate you!!!!

担忧

倒数三天了！！！！三天后，大马教育文凭考试成绩（SPM)将会放榜了。此时此刻，我的心情是非常紧张、担忧及害怕。我很害怕我达不到我所设定的目标。我很担忧我令父母失望，毕竟他们希望我能考获十一科甲等的成绩。我很害怕我辜负了他们的期望。现在再担心已为时已晚了、已为时已晚了。现在，我只能默默的祷告，希望我真的能取得优越的成绩。如果我的成绩不理想，我必定修读中六。我很怕修读中六，因为我很怕我撑不住那艰难的日子。中六不是像中一至中五那样“轻松”。那五年的求学生涯已经折磨我倒要生要死了，再读中六，我不知我还能不能负荷得了吗？我听许多中六生都埋怨中六很难。认识我的人都知道我的学业不怎么样，即不突出，也很平凡，完全不可能读中六。可是，不能读中六，我能干嘛呢？要得到奖学金难如登天啊！！！！我该怎么办？？？我觉得我的存在根本就是占据无畏的空间。我真的是很无用！！！为什么我会出现在这个世界呢？我发觉无论我做什么都没有人会重视我。算了，顺其自然吧！！！很多人都叫我不要杞人忧天，但说的容易，做的难啊！！！我不能睁一只眼，闭一只眼。我不能坐以待毙，更不能事事都以“船到桥头自然直”来达成所有事。难道我的生命就是如此？？？我可不可以希望奇迹常常发生在我的身上呢？我希望我能获得奖学金的资助，应为我希望我能直接进入大学。好了不说即将放榜的事情了。现在，我也很担忧我的国民服务营地的问题。前些日子，我获悉我被派去马六甲的营地，我完全没有任何心理准备。想到要离乡背井好几个星期，我就有些害怕与不舍。如今，我只能盼望我申请更换营地的期许能实现罢了！！！愿主能大大的祝福我！！

Feelings

I feel like I'm just a remaining girl.I always use my true heart to stay with them.But then,when I go out with them,I'm just alone.No ones care about me. As times go on, I feel like my existing is just like nothing. Do they really think about me???In my opinion, I am just like one of the particles in the air.I feel like I'm alone. This is not the first time I have this feelings.I feel disappointed.

Last night, I didn't even sleep for any minutes.I think my parents also same as me.Dad worried me so much.We discuss till 12 a.m..Whereas me ,I online till 130a.m.. Later I go to bed.However,I cannot fall asleep.I was thinking about national service things. I still asking myself,do I cares the national service stuff???I did not have any preparation that my camp will be at West Malaysia.

Insomnia

I didn't sleep well last night!!!Do I really cares about national service???When I knew I'm going to Malacca camp,I still can laugh .It was not like when i just received the news that I was chosen for national service.I didn't even sleep last night ar!!!!

OMG!!!

Just now ,Tan Chee Chee message me and tel me that can check the camp I am going for national service.At that time I am so BLUR...I does not know go where to check.I ask her back!!!So i go check when she tell me the outcomes!!!Then,I knew my camp is at Malacca.I did not have the preparation that I'm at West Malaysia's camp.My mum and dad were like...I knew they were worry.However. I don't know what should I say though i still have some joke with them.Now, what should I do???The only things that I can do is just pray to the Lord that I can change the camp.I hope that I can join Puncak Permai Camp.It is quite near to my house compare to Malacca.I have to sit plane to camp at there and I will miss my parents too much!!!!I am not independent enough!!!I hope I can get an scholarship so that I don't need to attend all the activities at the camp!!!!I think it is very tough because I seldom carry out exercise.Can i suit the condition???Does it good for me to try it???I am so blur...Tonight, I think my parents surely can't sleep well.Including me too...Now already 1230 a.m..I am still energetic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Now,i can only pray to the God that I want to have nearer camp so that daddy n mummy can visit during weekends.My darling,if I got the chance to stay at Bau Camp ,you say you will come and visit me.Please keep your promise!!!hehe

Me???

Who am I???I have lost myself???I'm just a remaining!!!!!!!!!!!!!!No one cares about me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!i HATE it!!!!!But I can do any things.Life have to be continued.No matter how hard is it,rite???If i can leave it aside this kind of feeling,it is good.However, I can't.